I'm struggling with my self. Reaching down into the deepest realms of what my mind has marked personality and searching frantically. What do I want? Web MD or Bicycle Monthly? The waiting room is crowded. The single chair buffer is a luxury threatening to vanish if another patient party should enter. Were talking ailing possibly contagious people here! They aren't exactly my peer group either. Mind you, I wouldn't fit in with the secret pregnancy test or sports team physical group of my age, but I'm talkin not a one of them couldn't get the senior citizen discount no questions asked. This wouldn't bother me too much- the age not the discount. I'm not particularly age-ist at my supreme maturity level. I really don’t have a problem with it. I don’t. But they’re staring at me! I try to imagine just for a moment what they might be seeing from their perspective. Short haired hoodlum girl child who obviously must be missin her schoolin, probably to get a drug test or other unmentionable.
Forgetting to turn the scrutiny external once more, I sit for a good moment feeling terrible. But before long I am distracted. I've watched out of the corner of my eye. I've done the Casual Glance over, and the Room Scan. And it’s true. That lady across the room staring at me. You don’t make eye contact 3 times in a row on properly spaced Casual Glance unless they're staring at you. This wouldn't be half the debacle it was if I had a decent magazine!
Tossing the MD aside I begin furiously flipping through the biking magazine. I'm completely lost. It’s talking about proper foot grips and obscure training tools. They're advertising a new bike design. I spend a moment drooling over it. It says ergonomic. It has lots of features. It’s pink and named something like Diva. It's probably expensive. Enough for my drool. Soon though the rapture passes and I give up. Tossing the magazine back on the table - that is passing it to my mother to do so- I resign myself to the inevitable staring contest about to ensue. Rest my eyes for a few seconds.... And she's gone. Crap, now how am I going to amuse myself?!
The door opens and a plump nurse in flowery scrubs summons me forth. I stride across the room toward her and the entrance to medical advice. I get about halfway, falter and look behind me to see if my mom is coming. She raises her eyebrows and slaps on a mock-encouraging smile. I shuffle forward, ever pulled by the nurses summons, glancing back hesitantly. Mother sighs, shakes her head, and follows. Score one for the puppy dog look. We march back through winding twisting halls lost in the labyrinth. I'm weighed measured and finally our guide leaves us alone in a cell. Only me with my charm and charisma could turn that bare utilitarian exam room into a superfluous throne room. I step up to my dais, and perch on its... paper lined cushion. Without a back to it I hunch and fold my arms. I feel deflated.
And then my doctor walks in. If you didn't think mothering type when you first saw her you probably think friend. She's not everything I might have imagined for a doctor/counselor/mentor, but she's close enough to throw money at. Things that I noticed about her... shorter graying blond hair, perfect teeth and a smile that still lively. I could see myself going to lunch or to backpack Peru with someone like her. She's smart but not imposing or arrogant, she's candid, unjudgemental and she understands the patients feel pain! She's great.
Anyway, I leave my visit feeling comforted that I have a doctor of my very own. Also a bit sore as my hand was frost blistered and bleeding. But it was only a little frost blistered and sore. I was in a good place. She had given me the quest of exercising at least 3 times a week, eat a variety of foods, and drop simple sugars all to feel my best and increase endorphins. And thus ends my blog prologue.
What I wanted to say is I've been on a health food binge for the last week or so. I've worked on the sugars... I'm hopeless but I'm working! I've been trying to use lower cholesterol alternatives in most of my cookings and the low sugar options too. Since my last food blog I've ran out of inspiration to cook. So the health food trip has made me even more creative than I am when I'm creative. Basically, I've had more whole grain, yogurt buttered, flaxseed creations than you could imagine. Lots of protein stuff too. Lots of fiber. My latest creation, an unholy concoction of Quaker oats, honey, egg, vanilla, baking powder, flax, cream cheese, whole wheat... pancake like goo, inspired by and named after the Wiggles' Crunchy Munchy Honey Cakes. I stirred it all together and cooked it on the griddle. Didn't even use butter! And it wasn't blatantly sweet...
Other than that... The painting goes well. Sort of. I inhaled stripper... wallpaper stripper vapors a bit much and irritated my airways... But it works so well! I've bought the paint and it may be even better than I imagined it would be. As I was drifting of to sleep I decided I should paint an ironwork pattern border along it. Either the top border or a divider type thing. Using a nice dark silvery gray color and going all intricate. I post pics if I come up with an exact pattern. Or better yet, show you when it’s all done! Like that'll happen...
It happens now that I am about to tell you my goal, I've realized I failed it today. I've been taking a picture a day as featured on www.photojojo.com . It’s been really nice and getting me out and snapping. But I didn’t today. Hmm... I did make some prints of my stuff the other day. Maybe one day I'll post some film ones.
At any rate, if anyone has some good idea's for lentils other than soup, let me know.
Last thing, did blog derive from the log? And if it did, where did the 'b' come from?